Planting Seeds and Throwing Rocks

I think that God is definitely taking our weakness and making it our strength.  Janna and I just cannot produce a child.  We tried using various ways and means and it just didn’t happen.  Biologically speaking…we are weak.  Genetically, we should fade away.  Fortunately there is a force and a Person that stands over and against weakness by embracing it.  In our weakness we get the privilege of embodying the spirit of adoption that flows from the heart of the Father.  My children are mine.  They are Moores.  They are not replacements nor facsimiles.  They are real and they are mine.  I get the privilege of raising them.  They hone me.  They are a spiritual discipline that tests me beyond personal prayer or fasting.  I chose to raise them and I can’t un-choose that.  Everyday I awake to face the reality that they need something from me.  I have to wake up.  I have to clean up.  I have to make sure they learn basic hygiene and politeness.  What I believe about Jesus and Christianity is tested everyday.  Have you ever tried to explain faith or God or the Holy Spirit or prayer to a child?  And have you ever done it without lying to them or to yourself?  I strain to be honest with what I believe and yet get on their level.  It is really, really difficult.  Not only do we have two children but we have a boy and a girl…one each.  And they are different.  Bess cries for reasons I know not.  She is emotional.  She wants me to be near.  I must put away the phone when we play.  I must.  She doesn’t understand that during the day someone may need to call Daddy.  And Isaiah is all boy.  He hits and he throws and he runs and he yells.  And it’s beautiful.  He makes me tired and I love it…I don’t always like it but it’s amazing.